A New Twist as I Enter College
It might be too tiring to cite and name all adjustments I’m going through right now in my college life. So many adjustments I nned to cope up with. Some are just simple ones, some are quite complicated.
One big twist I’ll be dealing with is the change of the environment. I know all of us will undergo situations like this. If before, during my grader and highschool days, I am more of fun, fun, fun, and I mostly go with group of students for malling, and whatsoever none sensical stuffs we do. This chapter, college life, I think will be another environ for me. ‘Cause now, I’m aware that I won’t make it through if I’ll just sit around and do nothing. I even see visions of the future..(wow) Yah! I’m rich of imaginations. I envision first the possibilities that’ll take place if ever I do this, or do that. And beleive me! It works!! Oooopps!! I think I’m far-out of the topic..weee..Let’s get back to it..
Actually, these past days, weeks, months, I’ve been worrying a lot…”Will I survive college?????” There are a lot of things I consider as reasons why I’ve asked that question. Based on my status now, I really am having a hard time mingling and dealing with the people around me. I sometimes, no, most of the time, feel like I don’t belong..I don’t want to feel it, but I just do. I’m becoming more conscious of my actions too. Because it seems like there are a lot of eyes staring at me. Searching for details they can criticize me for. And, I am afraid to be rejected, afraid to be alone..Afraid of almost everything!!! And mostly, one of the twists I’m afraid of, is that of my friends…Will I still find true friends on this phase of my life?? How I wish I’ll still find them…
And let’s not forget the “HIGH” expectations of the people from me. I can’t deny it…But it just seem to be additional burden to carry. What if I disappoint them?? (I hope not).. I even am practicing lines I should say … Will it be : “HURRAY! I DID IT AT LAST!!!” or “I DID MY BEST..BUT MY BEST WASN’T GOOD ENOUGH..” (WAAAAAAAAAAH!!! it’s driving me crazy!!)
How I hope they’ll somehow see the point that I need their support, I need their consideration..And mostly, I need them!! My family, my friends..Specially now on this striving point of my life.
I’ve come across this qoute once..And I love it!! It says:
“You are aware that you are less than what some people prefer you to be..But most people are unaware that you’re so much more than what they see..”
It’s really true..I believe it is…
Though I’m scared of what the future will be, I’m still determined to surpass this doubt in me. “THINK POSITIVE SUE!!! ” I usually cheer myself up.And it’s worth it!!… I strongly believe , these adjustments I need to face and cope up with, will not be a hindrance for me to achieve my goals in life…
And above all these “I KNOW’S”, I certainly do know what I need to do, it is to give my bestest best and the most powerful one.. PRAYER…..
I can do this!!! A J A ! ! !
