OoOps!! wrong move!!
Sometimes in life, we get into stuffs without even realizing what is it we’re entering, what will be the outcome, and who’ll be affected if ever..We just pretend it’ll all be fine, though somewhere, in the corner of our mind, there’s this one, tiny, single detail that freaks’ us out. Still, we try to ignore it and go on with our stupidity.
There are times when I get back my consciousness and then sooner, realize how much has changed. I even wished time would stop and go back to the past. So I could change whatever wrong decisions I’ve made that led me up to this point..But I can’t just set aside reality. I still feel the pressure of these all. If shouting will be all that is needed for me to get out of this hell, I could have done it a million times!! I’ll scream to the loudest, “Hey!! Somebody get me out of this damn situation!!” But it’s no use at all!! No matter how loud I shout, even if my throat sores, my vein burst, it can’t help me… I can’t run away just like that! I need to face the reality ahead. No matter how hard and painstaking it might be, I need to try..Try, and try, and try…Who knows??
I’ve dealt with a lot of troubles in my life. The hardest ones, mostly caused by commitments I can’t bear to handle anymore..Why say it’s the hardest ones?? ‘Coz it’s not just you alone that’ll be affected at all..It’s not just you who’ll suffer…And you can imagine the risks you need to make. You can endure it no more and wanted to let go…But thinking of how a person would feel, you just can’t…
So you pretend everything’s alright.. Though it’s never gonna be..
Pretend you’re happy.. Though you’re not..not even a bit..
Say you’ll always be there.. But did you really mean it??
Say yes, say no, what then??!! Which way to go??
To choose the best for yourself??
Or to choose to sacrifice and bleed all your life??
So hard……So heavy…..Wouldn’t there be somebody to help me?!
Help me find relief without causing pain to anybody..
Or, just make me disappear without any trace of me left in the air…
So, to that somebody I swear I care, forgive me dear for ever feeling this way….
I don’t know if it’s a sin to tell the truth and hurt someone….
I don’t know if it’s a sin to choose to be happy, to choose to be free….
I know not what to do…Somebody please help me…
So, one thing I can tell you, “THINK FIRST BEFORE YOU ACT”

P.S.
= CURSE ME NOT FOR WANTING TO BE FREE =